10 Things You’ll Never Overhear in Dubai

Sassy Mama contributor Maysaa shares 10 phrases you’ll never hear in this wonderful city of ours.

1) “No honey, we can’t go outside because it’s too cold.”

Even in the ‘winter’ seasons, you still go outside. There are about three weeks when a light sweater/cardigan is required (although I still can’t get my kids to wear one).

2) “I’m starving and everything is closed.”

Restaurants are open really late, all year round. There is none of the 9–5 system here. There’s actually a whole post just dedicated to food delivery. It’s a shock to find a food outlet that doesn’t deliver.

 3) “Geez, that sunshine is nice.”

Don’t be fooled. The sun here is suffocating beyond measure. Even at 6:00 in the morning, when I’m walking the kids to the bus stop, I feel like each ray of sun is saying ‘burn, burn, burn’. And let’s not talk about the middle-of-the-day sun. That feels downright deadly.

4) “Are you originally from here?”

Instead, it makes more sense to ask: ‘How long have you been in Dubai?’ or ‘Where are you originally from?’.

5) “There’s seriously nothing to do.”

Money aside, there’s always something happening. Yes, some things are over-the-top commercialism, but generally this city buzzes with activities. You just have to avoid falling into the ‘I can’t be bothered’ trap.

6) “It’s so easy finding a good school/nursery for the kids.”

By far the hardest thing in my experience. Waiting lists range from two to seven years. You read that correctly – years.

7) “I’m gonna stay here forever.”

I’ve met hundreds of people here, none of whom I’ve heard utter these words. Sure, people say ‘We are staying till the kids finish secondary school’ or something like that. Dubai is such a transitional place.

8) “I would love to buy that cot/bookshelf/shed, but there’s no one to help me carry it to the car.”

This is probably the greatest thing about Dubai – the service and honesty. Someone is always around to help. For some small change, you can get anything done.

9) “I wish we had chosen to live in Sharjah instead of Dubai.”

An inside joke. Sorry peeps, but only Dubai people will snicker at this.

10) “Wow, it’s so cheap to rent in Dubai!”

Just as Aussies complain about the weather, Dubai residents complain about property prices. Here, it’s common for the landlord to ask for a prepaid cheque of the entire amount up front. Yes, that is a lot of cash to have handy.