Tackling That Mama Guilt
After a hectic school year (so far at least) and lots of visitors, I decided that it would be great to treat myself to a little holiday, just a few days away with a friend at a health resort in Thailand. No biggie, right?
I was super excited. Packed my bag a week early and checked the resort website about a million times to tease myself about all the excellent activities and sightseeing opportunities coming my way.
But then, the night before the much-anticipated departure, my heart started pounding at the thought of leaving my precious monkeys motherless for 4 whole days! That night I dreamt that the walls of our home were crumbling around me and that the furniture was melting to nothing. Needless to say, I was ever so slightly anxious and feeling terribly guilty.
I overcompensated for my guilt by being super organised. Having laid out my girl’s school uniforms for each day, written a comprehensive list for the hubby and prepared lunch boxes, I felt a little less guilty about going. But it did make me wonder. Why do us mamas feel like we are being selfish by taking a short break?
Joanne Evans is head of Marketing for NUK, a UK based baby care Company, which commissioned research into mother’s guilt.
“It seems mums are suffering a huge amount of guilt when it comes to their kids, within days of their child being born, because of the myth surrounding how we should care for our babies. Even wanting a bit of time to themselves sees many berating themselves for not being the perfect mum.”
Joanne believes that the pressure that mothers put on themselves to be perfect and to do everything is detrimental to themselves and to the whole family.
“It’s important for mums to relax and worry less about whether they are doing what is perceived as the right thing, so they can enjoy their youngster’s childhood – guilt free. The most important aspect to child care is that the child is raised in a loving and caring environment and that mums recognise that if this is the case then they don’t need to feel guilty.”
Personally, I know that I came back from my mini break feeling relaxed and rejuvenated, ready to face the world as a Sassy Mama.
Did the kids come out the other side? Well, of course they did.
The precious monkeys bonded even more with their dad and he thoroughly enjoyed doing the little things that are usually mamas turf, like bath time and bedtime book reading. Sure, they may have had a little more sugar than usual, but hey, even the sassiest of mamas need a break every now and then.
Read more: 5 Reasons You Need to Retreat Now